My Heart Says Yes Read online

  Time for a change…

  Emma Blakely has a privileged life back home, but she is ready to shake the dust of her small Wisconsin town off of her feet, and start a new life in Chicago. Self-labeled the 'ugly duckling' in the family, Emma wants to get out from under her beautiful sisters' shadows and reinvent herself. She's about to graduate from college, wants to dump her college boyfriend of almost two years, and move on to the next chapter in her life. Always the older, reliable, chubby sister, Emma wants to start over. She transforms the summer before she moves to Chicago, and arrives as a brand new Emma.

  He wasn't part of her plan…

  Pursuing a career in advertising, she enrolls in portfolio school and decides this will be the year of Emma. Grateful for all that she has, she decides that she wants to give back somehow when she moves to Chicago. She decides to volunteer twice a month and she meets some very special people who touch her heart. Her plan that year is to not even think about guys and just have fun with friends, focus on school and volunteer her time. That's it.

  Enter Caleb Morgan; tall, gorgeous, chiseled looks, sexy and rich. Emma never imagined that a man that beautiful would ever look at her once, let alone twice. Always used to getting his way and always with a gorgeous girl around him, Caleb decides that he wants Emma. He turns her world on its head and Emma questions what he is really after, because she is far from the model type he normally goes for. Emma's head is fighting her feelings, but does her heart know better? One thing is for sure, Caleb Morgan was not a part of her plan.

  My Heart Says Yes

  (Blakely Sisters Series- Book 1, Emma & Caleb)

  by

  Ashley Blake

  ***

  www.ashleyblakefiction.com

  Other Books by Ashley Blake:

  The Billionaire’s Desire

  The Billionaire’s Desire 2: Dubai Confidential

  The Billionaire’s Desire 3: Ultimate Bliss

  The Billionaire’s Desire Bonus Book 4

  The Billioinaire’s Desire Bonus Book 5

  My Forever is You Book 1: Reunited

  My Forever is You Book 2: Resolution

  Table of Contents

  CHAPTER ONE

  CHAPTER TWO

  CHAPTER THREE

  CHAPTER FOUR

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CHAPTER SIX

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAPTER NINE

  CHAPTER TEN

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  EPILOGUE

  Published by Lovely Day. Copyright, 2013 by Ashley Blake.

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, locations, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination, or have been used fictionally. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental. No portion of this work may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the author.

  CHAPTER ONE

  I stared out of my dorm room window, down at the quad, and a deep sigh escaped my lips as I watched people walk by. It was two weeks before my college graduation and I was going out to dinner with my boyfriend Jordan that night. I was a little bit nervous because I was going to break things off with him and I don’t think he was expecting it. It's not that Jordan was a bad guy, he really wasn't. He was nice, reliable, supportive, and he really cared about me, but I can’t say he was my best friend. For me, we just didn’t get there emotionally. I had always done what other people expected of me, and I had finally decided that it was time for me to live the life I wanted, so the first major change in my life would be cutting Jordan loose.

  Jordan Miller and I met each other the first semester of our junior year of college and we had pretty much been inseparable ever since. Our friends and families thought we were perfect together because we seemed to have so much in common, and I started getting subtle hints from my mother that she wanted me to settle down with him.

  My family owned ten car dealerships across the state of Wisconsin so we were pretty comfortable financially, and Jordan’s family had old money and they were deeply involved in local politics. My mom thought we were a match made in heaven and I think my mother was afraid that I would never meet anyone else, so she was super supportive of my relationship with Jordan. My mother didn't have the same reservations about my younger sisters Katie, Brielle and Christine. Katie was two years younger than me and basically, I always felt like I was living in her shadow. She was absolutely gorgeous, tall, thin, had a bubbly personality, she was in a sorority and was extremely popular. I, on the other hand, was much more curvy, and fairly attractive, but did not receive anywhere near the amount of attention that Katie received when she would just walk down the street past a group of men. Men seemed to worship her and when I was being honest with myself, I knew that was something that I wanted. I was overweight, which I had been my whole life, I wore glasses, I was a brainiac, and I was that person that disappeared into the crowd rather than stood out in it.

  I was the oldest of four girls and, although I loved my sisters very much, it was difficult to not feel like the ugly duckling in the family sometimes. I used to joke with my mother that the milkman was my real dad because I looked nothing like my sisters. They were all gorgeous, tall and thin. I was the only one who was average height and slightly overweight. Katie was stunningly pretty and a sophomore at my university, and the twins, Christine and Brielle, were just finishing up their junior year of high school. They were fraternal twins and each of them were also really pretty girls. I know that people in town talked about us because I would always catch them looking at me with a bit of pity in their eyes. I could just imagine what they were saying about me. Poor Emma, she sure didn’t get the looks in the family, but at least she’s a smart cookie! I tried not to let the stares and whispers bother me, but sometimes they did. I knew that I needed to exercise, but I found comfort in my studies and Jordan never complained about my size so I kind of resigned myself to being the smart, chubby, older sister. To make myself feel better, I kept telling myself that one day I would lose the weight.

  My weight didn’t seem to affect my dating all that much, or at least that’s what I told myself. It wasn't like I never had boyfriends in the past, I did, but some of them seemed to be more interested in me because we had money or they wanted to get to know Katie. When I met Jordan I was a little bit worried that he also might try to use me to get to Katie, but he seemed to like me for me, at least in the beginning it seemed that way.

  We both went to a university in Appleton, Wisconsin and we were both from small towns in Wisconsin. Jordan was from Sheboygan Falls, and I was from New Holstein. Most of my friends back home were either in community college or were engaged to be married, and were on the marriage and family track. My friends’ lives were so planned out and we just never seemed to be on the same page. I wanted so much more out of life than to just return to my small town, get married and settle down. I wanted to get out from under my sister's shadow, reinvent myself, work at a big advertising agency in Chicago, I wanted to live in a cool loft in the city and do something meaningful with my life. My dreams were big and my ambition was even bigger.

  The only other person who shared my same drive was my best friend Kelly. We grew up together and our families lived two blocks from each other. She wanted to be a fashion designer and she was graduating from the Art Institute in Chicago and she was going to be starting grad school there in the fall. She lived in the dorms but we were planning to get an apartment together when I moved there. I was so excited to start a new lif
e and I couldn’t wait to move in with her. I was ready to put college and Jordan behind me.

  Don’t get me wrong, I used to enjoy spending time with Jordan, the sex was okay, nothing spectacular, and I would probably have a very comfortable life with him if we got married. The problem was I wanted more. Jordan wanted the picture perfect politician’s life, and I wanted heat and fire, I wanted to ache for a man, I wanted him to ache for me and I wanted him to consume me, and I just didn’t have that with Jordan. Maybe I’d read too many romance novels that had filled my head with fairytales, but I wanted to burn for someone and for him to burn for me, and I wasn’t willing to settle for less. Besides, I was way too young not to experience real heat and passion in a relationship.

  I had wanted to move to Chicago since my freshman year of high school. My aunt and uncle used to live right downtown, and I remember the first time we went to visit them during Christmas break my freshman year, it was love at first sight for me and the city of Chicago. I loved the hustle and bustle, the people rushing around to get everywhere and anywhere, the tall buildings, and just the energy that pulsed throughout the city. It was addictive and I wanted to be right in the middle of it one day. I felt stifled in New Holstein and was bursting at the seams to spread my wings. I didn't go to college in Chicago because I caved under my mother’s pressure to stay close to home in Wisconsin. She was afraid that something horrible would happen to me in a big city. Luckily for me, I got into a good school that provided me with all of the tools I would need to pursue my career in advertising. I always did want my family wanted, but now it was my time to live my life.

  I was a journalism major and I remember when I told my parents what I wanted to do with my life, my dad suggested that I work for his dealership and do all of their advertising. He didn’t understand that I didn’t want to stay in New Holstein anymore. My dreams were big and my parents didn’t seem to understand that.

  I decided that I wanted to attend portfolio school instead of relying on just trying to get an internship at an advertising firm to get my foot in the door. I was accepted at the Chicago Portfolio School, which has a one-year program instead of two like most portfolio schools, so it was perfect for me because I was anxious to get started with my career. Jordan had no idea that I was moving to Chicago and I knew he would probably not take the news very well. We really wanted different things. Jordan wanted to move back home to Sheboygan Falls and pursue a career in local politics. I just couldn't see myself as the wife of a small-town politician, not that there's anything wrong with that, but it just was not for me.

  Jordan picked me up at my dorm room at 6:30.

  “You look beautiful Emma.” His eyes were beaming as he looked at me, which made me feel horrible because I knew that he was not going to look so happy by the end of the night.

  "Thanks Jordan. You look great too. Are you ready to go?" I wanted to get out of there as I was beginning to feel really uncomfortable being alone with him.

  We went to HuHot Mongolian Grill, my second favorite Mongolian restaurant, since Mongo’s was now closed. As we sat across from each other, I was trying to figure out what I would say and the best time to say it. I didn't say anything about breaking up with him all through dinner, and when the check came I could barely swallow because I knew he would want me to go back to his place. I didn’t want to hurt Jordan, but I didn’t want to give him any false hope that we would have a future together. He insisted on paying for the check, and my knees were wobbly as we walked to his car. When we got to the car, Jordan stopped to turn and look at me and held my hand.

  “These past almost two years have been so great with you. Honestly Emma, I have never been happier in my life.”

  When I saw him reach into his pocket and pull out that little black box, I felt sick to my stomach. And then when he began to lower himself down to one knee everything started moving in slow motion. No! He’s not going to do what I think he’s going to do, is he? I had to stop him, I already felt bad enough since I was going to break up with him. I didn’t want him to feel hurt and humiliated.

  “Jordan, please don’t.”

  He stopped in mid-air as his knee was about to touch the ground and he had a puzzled look on his face.

  “I think I know what you are going to do and I want to save you the embarrassment.”

  “Embarrassment?”

  I looked into his eyes and then averted my eyes, nervously searching the ground. I took a deep breath and made myself look into his eyes. “Jordan. You know I care about you. But...”

  “Uh oh, there’s a but. This can’t be good.”

  I saw the sad look fall over his face as his eyes desperately searched mine for understanding.

  I grabbed his hand. “I just want to be honest with you. I really do care about you, but we are going in two completely different directions. I just don’t think we have what it takes to make it long term, we want completely different things. I know this might be hard to hear right now, but in a few weeks, or maybe months, you will be able to look back at this and realize that what I am saying is true. There is someone out there who is perfect for you and it’s just not me.”

  He stood there, looking sad, stunned into silence, and then I saw his face change. His sadness turned to disbelief, and then I saw nastiness consume his face as he snatched his hand away.

  "Wait a minute. Are you serious right now? You are breaking up with me? Are you kidding? In what screwed up universe do you think that you would ever find someone better than me Emma? You are lucky that I have even given you the time of day! Do you know how many girls I had to turn down because I was dating you? I'd like to see you do better than me. I overlooked your extra weight and mousy looks because I loved you. But you know what Emma? That extra weight that you carry around will only turn into more weight as you get older. And who will want you then? You just lost the best thing that ever happened to you.”

  I was completely shocked. Never in the nearly two years we had been dating had Jordan ever spoken to me like that. You would think that my initial reaction to his hurtful words would be to well up with tears and try to hold them back from spilling down my cheeks, but it was quite the opposite. This is how I knew I was completely over Jordan. Instead of feeling hurt by his words, I was pissed and I let him have it.

  "Listen you self-righteous, arrogant, son-of-a…”. Pull it together Emma, try to remain calm. I took a deep breath so that I could convey my words with some semblance of intelligence rather than using a string of profanity. "After all of the time we've spent together, including spending time with each other's families, you look like a real ass right now. Stooping to trying to hurt me with comments about my weight and looks? Really Jordan? How pathetic. All you did just now, saying all those nasty things to me, is confirm that I made the right decision about us. Someone who really loved me would never speak to me like that, and I would never want to be with someone who would stoop to that level. Now that you're a free man, maybe you should go look up one of the many girls that you had to turn down because you were dating me. See ya!"

  I spun on my heel and walked back to the restaurant, glancing once behind me to see Jordan staring at me in disbelief. It sucked that it had to end like that, but it felt really good to let him see that his words did not affect me. I had the restaurant call a cab for me and, as I stood outside waiting, I felt like I could finally breathe and I was ecstatic that the uncomfortable conversation was over. I had to admit, I was happy to put that whole relationship behind me so that I could look forward to my future.

  As I was sitting in my dorm room later that night, I thought about Jordan’s reaction and I had to admit I was a bit surprised by his nasty outburst. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that Jordan was not so much upset that I broke up with him as he was that I probably ruined his life plans. To Jordan, I fit perfectly into his family picture because I came from a prominent, well-known family in the state, I was smart and I was at least fairly attractive. That was the ideal woman for
him and his political ambitions, especially with us being college sweethearts. He used to make comments about how his constituents would eat that up and how it would help him win any election, any time. As I thought about how I had just avoided what my life could have been, I sat on my bed and smiled.

  The next weekend Katie and I went home to visit our parents and I had to break the news to my mom that Jordan and I had split up. I knew she was going to be devastated, but I was sure that she had probably already talked to Jordan’s mom, so she probably already knew, and my dad would most likely not say very much. He never seemed all that interested in anything I had to say and I just had to constantly remind myself that he did love me even though he rarely showed it. Now with Katie, he was a completely different story, he absolutely adored her.

  I glanced across the table to see my father beaming as he listened to my sister tell us how she was the star student in her English Lit. class. The twins were having dinner at their friend’s house so they weren’t with us that night. We were just finishing dinner when my dad wanted to know all about how Katie’s semester was going. It really should not have bothered me because I got straight A’s in all of my classes, and I was going to graduate summa cum laude from my university in a week, but it did. Even with all of my accomplishments my father never looked at me the way he looked at Katie, she was clearly his favorite. Whenever I would say something to my mother about how I felt that dad didn’t love me as much as he loved Katie, Christine and Brielle she would just give me a generic parental speech saying that he loved all of us equally. Even as she said it, I don’t know that she really believed it, but I just let it go because I didn’t want to make my mom uncomfortable. That was me, never really rocking the boat and always making sure that everyone else was okay. As Katie continued on, I just listened and vowed that one day I would see my father beaming at me in that same way.